How Tough Was Your Dad?

Hezel, Francis X. (2003-12-05). [www.micsem.org/book How Tough Was Your Dad?]. Micronesian Counselor (Report). Kolonia, Pohnpei: Micronesian Seminar. pp. 1–5.

• Has attachment: File:LCTJAHVI.pdf

Abstract: ...The changes in the form and function of the family that we have experienced in the last few decades are probably irreversible. No matter how strongly we feel about the old cultural ways, we can’t roll back the calendar. However, we can mobilize the resources that are left to us and we can make better use of them to help us raise stronger and happier families.

In the US and other countries with a long history of nuclear families there is a noticeable swing back toward the larger family. For Americans this doesn’t mean packing the house with aunts and uncles day in and day out. It means keeping an active lookout for opportunities to gather the clan and enjoy one another’s company–perhaps at special parties on holidays, perhaps by spending vacation time together, perhaps by extended visits with relatives who live at a distance. “Why wait until the next kid gets married to get the big family group together?” they seem to be saying. “We can invent ways of our own to bring together the larger family unit.”

In many parts of Micronesia today the same thing seems to be happening. This is a fruitful direction for the future, for children need access to other members of their extended family who once would have played a major role in helping them make the transition to adulthood. Uncles, aunts, cousins and grandparents–those persons with vital roles in the past–can still be key figures in resolving tensions and providing reassurance and guidance for the young...